Are you a people pleaser? Do you put yourself out for the preference of others? If so, you may find standing up for yourself challenging. Going against our government systems adds another layer of complexity. But, most of us are willing to step out of our comfort zone if our family is threatened. I’ve been there, and here are four steps that can help you be more assertive when you need it. It all begins with the first step.
Becoming More Assertive
- Gain confidence: When my husband suffered a work injury, I found that there are numerous loopholes in Worker’s Compensation. I did my homework. I researched. I read. I talked to attorneys. I talked to doctors. In short, I asked questions to help me gain confidence so I could develop a plan. There are a lot of curves and valleys in uncharted territory, but you do get there if you don’t give up. Get some helpful tools and read more about my journey in my book, The Dark Side of Injury.
- Be more assertive. You can question authority while standing up for yourself and your family in ways that are positive and proactive. Convey your ideas and thoughts directly and honestly. Avoid being passive (hiding your feelings), being aggressive (personal verbal attack) or being passive aggressive (giving the silent treatment or doing something behind the scenes). Assertiveness takes practice. It’s worth practicing because you can’t avoid all situations.
- Avoid victim mentality. There will probably be times when you are the victim. However, it’s important to work through and resolve the issue. When you accept less than desirable results or take negative experiences personally, you’re letting someone else control your life. Stand up for yourself, even if you need help to do it.
- Take action. When life throws you a curve, find a way to transform it into something good. I know that others will be saved some pain and agony through my malpractice actions. I wrote my book to share my family’s journey and tips/tools when working with worker’s comp, malpractice and the court system. You’ll often discover some “gems” by taking action instead of accepting defeat.
Unlearning old habits and standing up for yourself won’t happen overnight. You’ll become more effective and comfortable each time. There’s no time like the present….every journey begins with the first step.